Thursday, September 10, 2009

Respectfully Speaking...

One Frugal Girl topped off a few weeks of restful vacation with a stunning argument with her in-laws. She felt disregarded and disrespected. The one comfort: she had the backing of her husband in this fracas.

Poor girl.

It hurts to have someone you're related to...not love and respect you.

I have been very lucky; it's only happened a few times. Fortunately, there were other family members who expressed enough encouragement to counteract the rough stuff.

Have you ever gone through this? What did you do (or say...or feel) to get through it?

For me...it was Husband and his brothers, who made it clear that they loved and encouraged me, no matter what. Plus the strong sense that I knew who I was, and what I was capable of. I knew I had failings...I also knew that God and those I loved most dearly were well aware of those failings. In spite of all that, they still accepted me.

It's not just family, either -- I have this same sense of 'open season' every time I publish a new book or article. There she is...with a big target right on her chest! Ready, aim, fire...

Thick skins are a must. So is the ability to listen and analyze...but not let it destroy you. I'm not perfect -- so I don't expect to be treated as such. It's silly, then, to hate myself when I'm not. Only God is perfect.

Thankfully.

3 comments:

Allison Ann Aller said...

It must be scary, putting yourself out there like that in front of the public.
But your humble attitude is what will protect you from any slings and arrows!

Melisa @ Sweet Home said...

Thankfully, I've always enjoyed the full love and support of my in-laws. The more difficult relationships are on my side - with my father in particular. I determined early on to not let it shape who I am, and I eventually turned it all over to God and resolved it for myself in that way. I do the same with barbs that come my way from being in the public eye as an entrepreneur.

Sue Cahill said...

When my daughter was 4 my sister-in-law offered to babysit her while I worked. She had a one year old son. I found out from my daughter, who was quite outspoken, that there was a naked man who wasn't her uncle in the bedroom!
So I put my daughter in daycare and took the wrath of my inlaws, I couldn't tell them why, they wouldn't have believed me. But my husband stood up for me, a tough thing for him, being th eoldest son of Italian descent - he was expected to always cowtow to his parents.

Sometimes you have to do what is best for your family, regardless of family politics.

A thick skin has been hard for me to develop, still working on it.

Sue Cahill (sbonetsue at yahoo dot com)

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