God's Timing

     I am a very impatient person.

     Many times in life, I've wanted God to Hurry Up. After all, I've got 'people to see, things to do, and places to go.'

     Instead, He often slows it down.

     Case in point: The Mama's sickness. She was in and out of hospitals, rehab and care facilities since July 2021...and not in good health for at least a year before that. We relied on family help for much of that time. It became increasingly clear, after I'd spent August and part of September with her in Michigan, that wasn't enough.

      I could have remained here by myself. After all, I'd just done it for a month. But the Brick knew how difficult it had been, and insisted on coming, along with the trailer and the dogs. "After all," he said, "she's my mom, too." And that's where we've been, ever since: parked at the folks' farm. Much of the time, we've been 'camping' in the house, with the trailer in winter mode. 

     Did we choose to do this? Frankly, no. Michigan winters are gray, gloomy, cold and dreary. The Mama was sometimes in pain, short-tempered at times and often restless. But we'd put out some fleeces, and it was clear that we were supposed to be here. Probably just a few weeks.

    That was more than four months ago. We couldn't do our usual jobs, or see our friends in Colorado. I had to give up a number of work opportunities. We missed the holidays with the kids. (Though they came to us for a few days, the dears.) We couldn't go back to volunteer in McNeal, AZ. The trailer took some hits, weatherwise, and now the roof needs replacing. And it meant driving to see The Mama day after day, week after week, month after month....with no clear notion of how long this could go on. I'd made plans, but they didn't really work out. 

Leo Cumings photo - all others Pinterest or Wikipedia

     The Mama died Jan. 22. Two days after her funeral, we both tested positive for Covid. That weekend, we had to put down our beloved Charley. In spite of slowly getting better since then,  the Brick has had a relapse. So we start all over again, sleeping extra and taking things slow.

    Something has become increasingly clear: 

             This was all God's timing. 

    Yes, The Mama needed us. That part is true. She needed someone who could stop by and just sit with her, no matter where she was. 

     But other family members needed us here, too. They were tired --  often dealing with other problems that we could help with. We love our cousins -- and they love us back. A verbal or texted "attaboy/girl" would have been nice, but they needed US.

    Two dear friends were pastoring a small church nearby. They desperately needed someone to start helping with music -- right about the time we showed up. So that's what we've been doing, week by week. We also have helped out at Meadowlark, Mom's former care facility. They needed us, too.

    We were more exhausted than we both realized, trying to take care of matters in Colorado and Michigan at the same time. We weren't giving ourselves a chance to rest or work through issues without diving headlong into the next.

    The Mama's farm needed caring for. The Brick particularly did maintenance and repairs. Some issues, like the plumbing, could have gotten a whole lot worse, had we not been here. Other family members were out of town or didn't have time. But we did. 

    We've been able to babysit, bring meals, help out in so many random places. As co-executor of The Mama's estate, I've been here to help decide on a number of important issues. Some of it could have been -- and was -- done by phone. But other items, no.

    Who am I to say we've been 'wasting' our time here, when it's clear that we've filled in so many empty holes? 

    God's timing.

    Good things have happened. We've strengthened relationships with people we hold very dear here in Michigan. We loved them before -- but that's much deeper now. 

     People have come back into our lives, due to The Mama's passing, that I haven't talked to in years -- decades. I even had an urge to call a cousin who greatly wronged my parents and brother in the past...and heard him come closer to an apology than I have ever thought. (Maybe someday...)

    We've even gotten some extra rest. Enforced, it's true -- but we've been operating on a more limited schedule, commitment-wise.

   God's timing. 

   He doesn't show this kind of attention just for us. One cousin has been seriously ill with blood clots -- in fact, he may have been dealing with this longer than he thought. He and his wife had moved back to this small town not that long ago -- how could anyone do better than the much-larger place they'd moved from?

     Turns out that his doctor in Grand Rapids is one of the very best vein-related specialists in the country. Not just the state -- the country. 

    Another cousin became seriously ill with breathing issues after Covid. He was in the hospital for weeks -- and found out, after his discharge, that he'd been treated  by a doctor who was considered the #2 expert in that field. Just by chance -- the doctor was randomly assigned.

     God's timing. 

     The difficulty lies in reminding myself that I may have ideas for this, or a trip planned for that...but if I'm a daughter of the King, His schedule comes first. And He always makes these changes in our lives for a reason. Even something like the world cruise -- a lifelong dream-- being cancelled, had a reason. (I know some of them, at least.)

    Can I trust Him? 

              Whether it's a small item in our lives... or a really big one?

           Whether it seems the world will blow up or away, any second?

I can still trust Him. 

You can, too.

The human mind plans the way, but the LORD directs the steps.                Proverbs 16: 9