Thursday, June 1, 2017

Even More Things I Don't Understand

Ever since I posted the first version of this, more have come to mind. 

Somebody explain these -- please!


*Why do you run out of sauce long before the rice/potatoes are gone, no matter how hard you try?

*Why does my sewing machine run out of bobbin thread just before the last seam or two?

*Ditto for lawnmowers and gas.

*What exactly does "boogie woogie" mean, anyways? (See the B-man mentioned below.)

*Why do dogs and cats sleep so much... are they bored? Do they really need that much sleep? Charley & Abs are clocking in a good eight hours or more, just during the day.  Abby has this weird habit of clicking into the bedroom about 1 a.m., staring at us, then clicking back out to her blanket. She repeats the action about 4 a.m. Is she afraid we're going to the Bahamas in between?

*When it comes to us and sleep:

Don't forget about your toes, too.

We've mousetrapped a couple of denizens from the Spring Rush. The other night, I dreamed that my pillow side of our bed was full of little brown bodies. A few more were dangling from their tails off the bedside light. Woke up the Brick, thrashing around to get away from them. 
      Maybe it's their revenge, from us feeding them to the chickens. (Who love them, by the way -- they're delicious..)




*How come I can tell by the smell when baking items are 'done'... but the Brick could cheerfully walk by until they're actively burning? (This one REALLY puzzles me, since he is quick to catch too-brown items on the grill.)

*Why is it that a watched pot really doesn't boil that much? (Do pots know you're watching?)

*Kathy Griffin apologizes for being crass and disgusting. (Although ISIS, with its policy of decapitations, no doubt is proud of her.) Did she really think holding a bloody 'head' of Donald Trump was in good taste, to begin with...was she just sorry she got a huge negative reaction? Or did she suddenly see the light?  (Frankly, I think it was dollar signs. She lost some lucrative work because of her actions.)

     See what you think.




*Why does the Denver International Airport (DIA, otherwise known as 'the bra commercial')  feature a red-eyed, rearing, snarling Bronco, full 'tackle out,' as a welcome? The Blue Mustang, also called Blucifer, has the honor of having killed its creator, sculptor Luis Jiminez, during construction. For more on the Bronco statue, and other DIA conspiracy theories, you'll enjoy this. 

     If you're wondering, "Is it really that creepy?" Yes, yes, it is. Especially at night.


For more fun things to do in Denver, besides stare at Ol' Blue, go here for a good-sized list.
Be sure to reassure him I didn't mean anything personal by it.

*When you've got a multi-connection plane ticket, why are the gates practically miles away from each other? Atlanta is especially good at this. Kansas City and Chicago are right up there, too, but DIA also does its part.

*Speaking of airports:

Yikes!


Little kids are known for staring under the stall doors when you're in a public bathroom. (Particularly little boys.) But what about this?

Must have gotten lost.

*Why is Hillary Clinton blaming everything and everyone she can think of, for her November election loss? Her recent interview is highly illuminating. High on the list are everyone who think the "nothing burger" of her e-mail system was important. (After all, James Comey cleared her by declining to press charges, right?) Next on the list are misogynists; anyone who has a problem with her getting big fat speech honorariums; Those Mean 1,000 Russian Agents; Wikileaks; the New York Times; and finally her own party. From the interview:
     "She complained that when she became the Democratic nominee, she inherited a data machine from the Democratic National Committee that she described as 'bankrupt' and 'on the verge of insolvency.'
     'I inherited nothing from the Democratic Party,' she said.
     By contrast, Clinton noted, her opponent had access to the resources and data of the Republican National Committee -- a sentiment the RNC immediately took note of and began circulating."

Let's see. Who else can go on the list, to prove she had nothing to do with it? "I take responsibility for every decision I made," she said. "But that's not why I lost."
     Maybe she could blame a heinie or two. Or make a little list:




*Why is Donald Trump playing so much golf? And why is he charging the American people for staying on his own property, the Mar Lago resort?  Isn't this the man who promised to be straight and open...and stop wasting money? Recent figures suggest that more has been paid on the Trump family's behalf for lodging, security and other expenses  in the past six months, than the Obamas spent in years. (And I thought some of their trips, like Mrs. O's and the girls to Spain, were way out of line.)  As of late February 2017, he'd made three trips, at a cost l of about $10 million to American taxpayers. And he's been there a BUNCH more times since then.

     Couldn't he stay home in the White House for awhile, and save us some money? (Barron's school year should be done by now, too.) 

(See, Gentle Readers -- I told you I was an equal opportunity griper, politically speaking. I'm actually registered as a Democrat, but have voted independently for years. Regardless of Mrs. Clinton's assertions, it's the person, not the party.)

Speaking of President Trump -- would people please stop worrying whether he and his wife are holding hands in public?  Pleeaassee?


Now, on the economic front: the perils of being polite.


I've apologized to a car door and one of those revolving automatic doors, too.



And finally...













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